Tuesday, 4 March 2014

Why Everyone Needs a Writing Buddy

You know how it is when someone asks what you do and, when you tell them, you get a variation on these answers:

"Have you written a novel yet?"
"How much money do you make?"
"I suppose you'll be writing your own Fifty Shades then."

That's people you don't know.

Your friends might ask a few polite questions such as, "So how's the writing going?" but if you answer more than, "Fine," you can see their eyes start to glaze over.

Of course I can't blame them. If I ask my husband how his day has been, I'm more interested in whether Nigel has seen the badger in his garden again or whether Tom has managed to sell his house yet than whether the new flow meter is working properly. I have to remember that not everyone is interested in writing in the same way that not everyone is interested in engineering.

This is why we all need a writing buddy. I'm not talking about someone who will share and critique your work (although many writing buddies like to do this) but someone who knows where you're coming from; who understands the joys of a sale or competition win along with the frustration of the rejection; who you can share writing news and information with you and talk about all those things that would bore other people silly.

I'm lucky in that I've got Tracy. We met first through our blogs and then in 'real life' a year ago for teacakes in our local café. We've met up every month since for writerly chat.

This morning we talked about our last month's writing goals and whether we've achieved them, the merits (or not) of writing holidays, writers on Facebook, competitions, loss of writing confidence, experiences of womags, merits (or not) of Scrivener, whether it's possible to write a novel without a plan......
 
We also set new targets for this month.

The two hours we spend in the café are invaluable... and the teacakes delicious!

I urge everyone to get themselves a writing buddy if they haven't already got one.






30 comments:

  1. It sounds like you had a great time, Wendy. What a lovely idea!

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    1. I really look forward to the monthly writerly chats, Emma.

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  2. You're right, writers do need to talk to other writers. Maybe that's part of the reason so many of us have blogs?

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    1. Yes, I think that probably is the reason, Patsy.

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  3. A group of us who were published under the same imprint try to get together about twice a year to exchange views and air our grievances over lunch. It's enormously helpful. We also have a google group email address, and can exchange news privately that way. The mutual support is iinvaluable.I wish we coud do it more often, but we all live miles away from each other.

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    1. 'Mutual support' that's exactly what it is, Fraces.

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  4. I totally agree with you Wendy. Now who lives near me that I could accost for teacakes and a chat?!!

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    1. I'm sure there's someone out there Sam!

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  5. It's such a good idea because writers need other writers. No-one else can understand what we do. And, because it's such a good idea Glynis Scrivens and I have written a joint article about it, which will be in the next issue of The New Writer.

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    1. Hey! Tracy and I could have been in it and then we would have been famous!

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    2. I completely agree Wendy. I met my lovely writing buddy in real life four years ago, and she's become my best friend! It's good to talk about writing to someone who really 'gets' it and I never send out a story without her giving it the once-over. I just need to initiate her into eating teacakes now :o)

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    3. Yes, tea cakes is an important part of it, Karen! Hope you writings going well.

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  6. Couldn't agree more, Wendy - I had lunch yesterday with two of my writing buddies before the afternoon writing group meeting!

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  7. What a good post, Wendy - and that's got nothing to do with the fact that I'm in it! Actually, which one am I in the picture? I so look forward to our monthly meet-ups as I don't think family or other halves ever quite get it. Don't quite know how I existed before our teacake goal sessions!

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    1. Actually I think the one on the left looks mote like Patsy with her new sleek hair do. You didn't actually exist before the teacake goal sessions, Tracy - you were a figment of your own gothic imagination!

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  8. I so agree with you, and consider myself blessed to have at least two really good writing buddies who I know I can count on to keep me motivated. Its about giving too, in fact I think I like the idea of helping another writer better.

    You are quite right when you say no one understands the writer like another writer. Aren't we lucky!
    Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Yes we are very lucky - and thanks for commenting, Maria.

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  9. I had to laugh about the eyes glazing over! That is exactly what happens - but never with writing friends x

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  10. I agree, after sitting for so long at your desk wondering if you're going in the right direction, its great to have someone give you that injection of inspiration. As for friends who are not writers - after 50 shades, its easy to dash of a best selling trilogy, anyone can do it, no big deal. I wish!

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    1. It's funny how people think that isn't it, Linda.

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  11. I so agree with this post,Wendy. Every writer needs a writing friend. x

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  12. I get comments like, oh, you'll be like J.k. Rowling then, or Agatha Christie.... it's great to have a blog like yours Wendy, and help improve the writing.

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  13. I agree with everything you've said, Wendy. I'm lucky enough to meet up with writing buddies regularly as well and we too set ourselves targets. We all met at a writing class which we didn't want to end!

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    1. It must have been a really good class if you didn't want it to end, Jan.

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